Monthly Archives: December 2014

Dear Christmas,

Over the past 24 hours I’ve ranted and raged regarding how much you suck.  There was not time to make candy, write, copy and mail a witty Christmas letter summarizing our year or even properly decorate the exterior of our home.  Gifts are wrapped in yawn-worthy fashion, with no fancy flourishes or festive adornments. Traditional krumkake and spritz cookies still reside in their elemental forms as flour, sugar, eggs, etc., with zero chance of combining and evolving into delectable treats. But all of these transgressions aside, the most heinous offense this year is the disgusting lack of Christmas knitting.  4/5 of one sock is done and the only actual “completed” garment is a lovely, squishy, blue hat… which is MIA.  I’ve turned the house upside down and inside out vainly searching for said hat, but it’s whereabouts remain a mystery.  Of course, having carpet the exact shade of blue do not help when delving into closet corners, but I’ve steeled myself against the possibility of spiders and manually swiped the darkened recesses, to no avail.

Following hours of fuming, complaining and resenting Christmas, I had an epiphany. Christmas falls on December 25th.  Whether or not this is the actual date of Jesus’ birth is not a topic up for dispute, as most scholars pinpoint his birth to be in the spring.  It’s dark and dreary in the throes of winter, so we choose to recognize and celebrate it to brighten the darkness and we do so on the same day. Every year.  That being said, the only conclusion I have is that I owe Christmas a huge apology.  It does not suck.  It has done nothing wrong.  In fact, it’s consistency is a concrete norm to be thankful for.  The reality is that I suck. My planning often far exceeds reality and time management is not a strong point.  

So, Christmas, keep on being your regular, dependable self and maybe next year I’ll be more organized.  My sincerest apologies for the slander (and libel too, because I wrote a few nasty posts on FaceBook). Christmas you rock!

Merry Christmas and God bless us, every one!

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And So It Begins…

Christmas decorating began hard on the heels of Thanksgiving.  So far the Christmas Village, lovingly collected over many years by my late mother-in-law, and kept in storage for more than a decade following her death until my girls were old enough to be trusted with it, is again set up.  

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The only problem was that last year they did play with it. Dragons rained fire from Mt. Snow. The proper little Victorian people partook in vulgar activities, some posed and jumped from rooftops to their doom. Kittens were tossed in the river. Dr. Who’s Weeping Angel even made an appearance. The girls enjoyed themselves, but their frivolous antics resulted in some broken pieces. To prevent more loss each of them were lectured severely about what would happen should history repeat itself. So far Snow Village remains safe from pillage.

Of course the usual critics inspected the decorating. 

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Some old world favorites are making their annual appearance. These delightful gnome/elves hale from Finland. They are so very sweet!

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The girls all know that to touch the Nativity set is also forbidden.  This set was a gift to me from my late mother-in-law on the first Christmas that we were married.  I’d be heartbroken if anything happened to it.

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That being said, and now that the village is off limits, A2 found a way to skirt the “meddling” rules by posting this sign near the Nativity set, but technically it isn’t touching any of the figures. 

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For those of you unable to make out the hastily scribbled note (which is probably everyone, considering how sloppy the writing is), it says, “And then God said, ‘Let there be Wifi!'” It sits next to the wireless router.

Getting the girls to school and work seems to be a never-ending task, so I’m woefully behind on Christmas knitting, writing cards, mailing packages, etc.  Only two gifts have made it off the needles.  Here is the first sock in one of three pairs to be completed.

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Time to up my caffeine intake.  Cheers, my friends! 

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